faith, life, depression, struggle

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

From the hospital, a path to hope


I know I was headed to one of two places: the hospital or the morgue. It seems odd to say this now, given how intensely I've felt a desire to die for the past 9 months or so, but I can say it: I am glad it was the former.

Three days of inpatient attention and a new med added to the mix have made a big difference already. I still get the dips into sadness and negative thought pathways, but I don't stay there; my attention gets refocused by other things in my field of attention.

I thank God that, once again, He has saved my life and my sanity. For however long this phase lasts, I'll gladly take it. This is no miracle cure, I know; been down this road many times. But it is a new direction, and it's one I'm glad to take, with no small amount of relief.

Finally, a sense of hope within. And once again, I see the cross of Jesus Christ stands as the source of all the hope I have. And to that I say, hallelujah.

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